31 May 2016

R and I

As what Toni of Wifely Steps advised me, I am reposting this lengthy caption here that I first posted on Instagram, my personal Facebook account and page of this blog. Here it goes.


"Medyo mahaba ito but I have a confession kasi. We don't like each other that much the past months or maybe years, R and I. Yes, we love each other. Yes, we are very married and I think we are our girl's "relationship goal". But you know, there are times na gusto lang namin pikunin ang isa't-isa. Minsan sadya, minsan hindi. Hehe. It's given in any marriage, in any relationship - ang mapikon sa partner. There were times (many times, I tell ya) na ayoko na, na ayaw na rin niya... eh kasi nakakapagod na nga. Pero eto pa rin kami oh! Kasi nga, wala, we can't live without each other! 
I am not writing this to brag about our marriage. It's super far from perfection. Unang-una, hindi kami kinasal sa church. Wala kami nung mga malalagkit na tinginan na madalas makita sa prenup photos, haha. Nagka-baby muna kami bago kami kinasal. Tapos ayun pa, LDR. May mga times na nagseself-pity ako. Inggitera rin kasi minsan ang muther niyo. But recently, I finally realized and accepted that whatever our situation is, I'm blessed to have him. Our marriage may not be ideal, my husband may have shortcomings, I may have topak (ang dami, dude haha) but you know what, we're good. Steady kami. And all because we have the same goal in life - to live comfortably together. 
I know there will be some who'll surely roll their eyes when they read this. Kasi nga daw may study that says na yung mga madalas na nagpo-post sa social media about their relationship, yun yung hindi talaga okay. May mga kakilala naman talaga akong ganun. But not us. We post happy stuff when we're truly happy and we're quiet (even in social media) when we're not. So alam niyo na. Hehe. 
This lengthy testimony is for other couples like us who are in a military marriage, marriage without an expensive church wedding, marriage that came after the baby, and long distance marriage. Our marriage is not ideal but we can make it work. Ika nga ni Alma Moreno, dasal lang, dasal lang talaga." 

The last sentence came out naturally. Hehe. Seriously, though - prayers do wonders! My closest friends know how much I really wanted to give up on us during those times na magkaaway kami. Our fights were intense! Teleserye levels, ganern. We even came to a point na nate-turn off na kami sa isa't-isa. As in konting-konting na lang, broken family na kami and Sophia will never have the happy family that she has right now. But because we just let love win, we're here. In fact, we will be celebrating our 6th year as Mr. and Mrs. on December and 10th year of togetherness on February 2017. Sana we can spend it out of town with our girl. Travelling has done beautiful things to our souls as lovers. The recently concluded summer has proven that.

Ikaw, what's your kwento? 

6 comments:

  1. Wow I can totally relate mother!

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    1. Na ano, na masarap makipag-pikunan sa mga asawa natin? Haha! 😄

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    2. Yep! Gawain din namin yan tapos ako ung unang mapipikon! hahaha

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    3. Haha! I was like that before. Pero hindi ko pinapahalata. Ngayon, I don't know if it's a good thing but ako na yung nagma-maneuver ng relationship and conversations. Feeling ko sa akin nakasalalay if mag-aaway kami o hindi. My husband kasi is basically a not-so gentle guy so kapag napikon o pinatulan ko yung angas niyang magsalita, away lang aabutin namin. Thank God I'm a communicator by nature. Nagagamit ko yung skills na yun sa kanya. :D

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  2. Wow, I am not alone pala. Actually, me and my hubby fight a lot. Literally fight! I love him, he loves me and he cannot live without me.Most of the times, i just provoke him whenever he was not in good mood coz I cannot accept the fact na parang kawawa naman ako. Maybe thats also because we are both panganay, gusto parehas na boss. Until now there are times pa din na nagaaway kami. But you know what ganun pala talaga pag mahal mo, you can endure everything not everything coz i also have my limit. There is one thing i always remind myself whenever i came to a certain realization that im giving up. It the thing that i promise myself when i was single. " I will not get married and have broken family or separated in the end". So i will stick to him till the end. Life is not always smooth sailing. In marriage, we dont just love a person, we build a good friendship and strong relationship that maybe can surpass love. We're on to our 9th year marriage, 10th year together as a couple.

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    1. You're right, Mdhel! Life is what what we actually make it. So when we say it sucks, it's because we allowed it to suck. Though we can't control our partners' emotions and reactions, we can still do something on our part. At yun nga ay maging matatag sa kabila ng lahat.

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